Never Runs Dry

What goes comes to mind when you read “never runs dry”? For some reason the first thing that comes to my mind is alcohol. lol. (And my drinking experience is a couple of sips every year or two.) Specifically, “the wine is flowing freely” comes to mind. I didn’t actually know what that expression meant so I looked it up. People on say that it refers to the conversational inhibition that people feel when they are drunk. Hmmm.. now that I know that I should probably switch expressions/metaphors. First, let me share the picture that came to my mind with the phrase “the wine was flowing freely.”

In the gospel of John there is story of Jesus turning water in to wine at a wedding and saving the reputation of the bridegroom. Here is the conversation that happened afterwards between the master of the feast and the bridegroom:

“Everyone serves the good wine first, and when people have drunk freely, then the poor wine. But you have kept the good wine until now.” (John 2:9-10)

Another story that comes to mind is about a woman who was so impoverished that her sons were about to be taken away as slaves to pay off her debt. This is an ancient story but it is a scenario that still happens today. She asked Elisha, a man of God, what she should do. His answer was to borrow as many jars as she could from her neighbours and fill with with a tiny vial of oil that she had. Miraculously all of the jars were filled and she was able to pay off her debt. You can read the story in 2 Kings 4:1-7.

So many other stories come to mind. Water from a rock in the desert. Jesus choosing to reveal his identity and offer “living water” to the woman at the well…

When I think about the landscape of these stories it is much like what we face today. Poverty. oppression, risk of losing face and dignity. The daily news is at times more heavy and supsensful than an action movie both locally and globally.

People are stranded in Afghanistan as military personnel shed tears over 20 years that may have been in vain. Yemen children are on the brink of extinction.

In Canada, we face a rushed election campaign with more anger flaring up than ever before. (On one hand I like the a shorter campaign of parties vying for power)

The COVID toll continues bringing with it confusion, fear, mistrust, misinformation and division. My heart specifically goes out to those who have been in ICU and have died from the virus as well as those who have been injured and have died from the vaccine and all of their loved ones. It is easy to look at stats and forget the people and stories behind the numbers.

And wow, the doctors and nurses burning out saving people’s lives and front-line workers, business owners…. .

Here at home, my husband is feeling the burden to provide with his new business as our personal savings begin to show their finiteness. I am starting to feel PMS symptoms once again after a summer of longing for pregnancy.

Today was a beautiful sunny day with a joyful little girl but I felt cloudy inside.

Then right after dinner my sister in law sent me this text: “[my nephew’s school’s] theme this year “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer” (Romans 12:12). When I saw this, I automatically thought of you-you are totally a true example of this message.” Now, I am not sharing this to brag but that it was timely encouragement because I don’t have solutions for any of the issues on my heart and in the world. There are things I can do obviously, but I can’t make it all better. And that is where the true beauty begins.

Yesterday, when I realized that I was going to have my period I was like “I quit!” Not quitting having sex but quitting anally tracking my cycles and putting intimacy on a strict scedule and thinking every day about what it would be like on to be pregnant and how it will affect Elaina. And when I decided to let go a huge weight lifted. It was literally like a fog was gone and I could enjoy my day and my daughter. It was kind of exhilarating and I realized how much I was trying to control that mysterious miraculous meeting of sperm and eggs. I have friends in college who perfectly timed their pregnancies around summer breaks and Elaina came pretty much on demand but this season is different. I remember a friend of mine saying “I think God wants to suprise you.” And it is hard if not impossible to suprise someone who is seizing control.

Going back to the stories earlier, it was interesting to see what Jesus was doing. He didn’t have to do the miracle. He could have let the bridegroom be embarrased in front of a bunch of drunk wedding guests but out of love he gave an abundance. Out of love, the prophet before him spoke in faith to a desperate widow. Out of love, Jesus spoke of his true identity for the first time to an outcast in her community.

His presence and love is a well that never runs dry. I may feel barren and empty (after 3 months of trying for a second child) but I am not. And whatever challenges that come I can choose to trust and receive the kindness and hope of Christ and share that with others. I can also trust in his justice and power that is far greater than my own. He does have the whole world in his hands.

One more story is of an act of overwhelming kindness not by Jesus but for him.

A woman breaking a priceless treasure to pour perfume on his feet along with her tears much to the shock and dismay of the men around her. This story has at times caused me to force devotion and somehow pretend that I have that much profound gratitude. But you can’t fake or force being willing to publicly embarrass yourself by showing such intense feelings and affection. She was not distracted by or held back by the challenges in her life or unfair treatment against her. She was not bound by pride or bitterness. She knew that she had been given much. Knowledge that sank down to deepest core of her being.

Never Run Dry by Housefires is a song that has been in my head all week. It was a song that I first heard 3 years ago when we were going to try for a baby against the odds of low hormones (we won) and I was again encouraged by this song when I had a really hard pregnancy. I will close with the lyrics.

Just want to add: Happy September! Fall is my favourite season with colours and birthdays and cool fresh air. Though my heart is heavy right now I know that joy will come in the morning.

Even in the wilderness
Through confusion and barrennes
You are beautiful God
Even in my brokenness
Through this pain I will confess
You are always good

Deserts will bloom in the light of Your love
Valleys make room for the river of God

You never run dry, never run dry, never run dry
You never run dry, never run dry, never run dry
You never run dry, never run dry, never run dry

You’re my source, never ending
You’re my life, never lacking
You’re my source, never ending
You’re my life, never lacking

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